Peter and Coach Mcguirk's trip to Rurouni Kenshin
by Smorselology 101
Summary: CHP 4 UPLOADED as if n e 1 cares...smorsel the giglee puppet and shelley have joined forces! what kinda maheam will insue? what?the kind where couch mcguirk meets peter and they travel to kyoto, kenshin time? read if u please, flames accepted
1. Default Chapter

Peter and Couch Mcgurk's trip to Rurouni Kenshin  
  
A/N: Yo Shmoe!! This story has absolutely nothing to do with anything. So, enjoy!!!!! Disclaimer: we's don own Poochie, family guy, home movies, Rurouni Kenshin, cardcaptor Sakura, wizard of oz, Shelley owns Siye, but Smorsel, the gigglee puppet doesn't, and we's no own anything else mentioned in here that I might have forgotten about. O yea! We's no own Guatemala, sombreros, ponchos, and again, anything else mentioned in here that I might have forgotten about.  
  
Chapter uno: The meeting  
  
Once upon a time there was a guy named Coach Mcguirk. He suddenly felt like having a Sunday drive through the neighborhood, even though it was Thursday. He lost his license only a few days ago but he still went driving anyway. As he was driving he then stopped in the middle of a four way intersection to see a guy dressed in a Turkey costume break dancing in the middle of the street and a little boy next to him pointing a gun to the guy's head.  
The unsuspecting Coach then stopped and lowered his window to the man, " Hey." he said in a senseless tone, " Get it." the man in the Turkey suit thought for a moment, " But Lois said I couldn't talk to strangers," He said in a childish voice but still busting his moves, " I'm not a stranger, my name is Coach Mcguirk." " Oh Okay, I guess it would be okay." So he hopped in with a smile of glee and drove off into the distance.  
" So whats your name stranger?" Coach asked, " But, I thought we weren't strangers," he said, " It's a figure of speech, just because I say it doesn't mean I am a stranger, whats your name?" " Peter, Millhouse Griffin, I like to be called James Bond," " So what, should I call you James bond or just Peter? By the way who's the kid?" Peter looked in the back to see Stewie messing with his gun, he gasped in fear, " OH MY GOSH WHO ARE YOU?!?!" the kid glared, " Yes.. Fat man who am I?"  
So, on they went, but low and behold, Mcguirk started going faster. "My Gosh!" Stewie gaped in awe as a purple aura surrounded the car. "Ah! Ah! It's gay! Oh my gosh! I'm blinded!" Peter said as he noticed the purple light. Then the car was lifted into the air as if it were in the Wizard of Oz and Peter could swear he saw a which but it really turned out to be his mother on a broom, "Mom??" She replied, by saying, "You must go find Okina that lives in the Aoiya, in Kyoto, Japan, for he is a jolly old fellow." "Whoa, do you have any beer in here?"  
"Alright, listen to me. Your mother told you somthin', so you should listen and do what she says." Peter just stared at Couch Mcguirk like the idiot he was. "The beer's in the back." Suddenly, a strange little furry orange animal with a puffball at the end of his tail appeared. "There is a strange aura here." it said. "Whoa, a Poochie! I've always wanted one!" Peter replied, delighted that he finally was able to have a Poochie. "Imbecile! I saw him once on one of those shows on Cartoon Network! He's. oh, dang. What did she call him? Piro!" Stewie thought as the thing came closer to him. "Where is she? What have you done with Sakura?!" the thing practically yelled at Stewie as he grabbed him by the collar.  
"What the deuce are you doing grabbing me by the collar? YOU WILL PAY!!" Stewie stated as he pulled out his Plutonium gun and shot the orange creature. "I don't like fuzzy things anyway. Right Rupert?" Outside the car, Peter, Couch Mcguirk, and Stewie could only hear faintly someone saying, "NOOOO! KERO!" They passed it off as the wind. Suddenly, the car landed with a thud, and the next thing they knew, they were in an old fashioned carriage.  
"Hey, where's my beer?" Peter and Coach Mcguirk said at the same time. Peter, in response, laughed his priceless laugh. I'm not kidding, it was worth $.1. Lots of money back in the day. Anyway, the carriage came to a sudden halt, and everyone fell out, Peter landing on top of Couch Mcguirk, who landed on Stewie, who landed on his priceless plutonium gun. No, wait, it was his sniper rifle. Before anyone had the chance to say "ow", a bored, yet tired sounding voice came from up above them. "Hello, my name is Sanosuke. I will guide you to your table. Follow me please." By this time everyone had gotten up, Stewie sitting on the ground, sorrowing over the death of his sniper rifle. "We're not here to eat, Kay. We're here to see a guy named Okina or whatever." Couch Mcguirk said in his usual tone of voice.  
"Why would you want to see Okina?" A girl with dark blue hair and her bangs parted to one side asked, as she passed by, while hitting Sanosuke on the head, because he was picking his nose with his pinky. "Well, Peter here, his-" Mcguirk was cut short of a loud laughing noise in the general direction of Sano. Of coarse, it was Sano. "What kind of a name is peter?" Sano said in-between laughs. "Well, well, what kind of a name is Stewie? I mean, who would name their kid Stewie?" peter replied with a snicker. "Oh look. The fat mans drunk!" Stewie said, still sorrowing over his rifle. "My names not Stewie." Sano said. "Exactly." Peter said as he smiled moronically. Everyone, including everyone in the Aoiya stopped everything they were doing.  
"Right." Couch Mcguirk started off again, as everyone went back to what they were doing. "Anyway, Peters mom came to us in a premonition, alright? She said 'You must go find Okina that lives in the Aoiya, in Kyoto, Japan, for he is a jolly old fellow', so we came to find him." "Well, you're a little late. He's dead." She paused for a second, then asked, "Would you like some sake?" a little overly too happy. "Is that the stuff that makes you immortal?" Peter asked with a little skip to his voice. "N-No, I don't think." The young girl answered a little dumbfounded. "We'll take it." Peter said, picking up Stewie. "Fat man! Put me down this instant! DANG YOU! DANG YOU ALL!"  
As they went in, they noticed a boy, about 14 years of age, with spiky black hair, spiking in every direction, wearing a yellow gi and next to him a girl with short brown hair and brown eyes. The boy had an apron on and was blushing; the girl, giggling so much, she was practically dying. "This is stupid. I feel like a retard." He said. "Oh, you look cute, Yahiko- chan!" She said. "Don't call me Yahiko- CHAN." He said, frustrated. " If only there was a girl that was like me, and didn't care about girlie stuff as much as other girls, and had white-chocolate colored hair, and green eyes. And her name was Siye." Yahiko said with a dreamy look in his eyes. Suddenly, a girl with White-chocolate colored hair, and green eyes, and a nametag that said ' Hello! My name is Siye!' on. "Ohmygosh, Yahiko!" She said. He replied by saying, "Ohmygosh, Siye! Doyouwannagotothishotspringifoundwithme?!" "Ohmygosh, sure!" And off they went, skipping the whole way, leaving a confused, but slowly getting what just happened Tsubame behind to catch Yahiko's apron as he threw it back to her.  
"Whoa, that reminded me of these two gay kids back home named Walter and Perry." Coach said, with a look that looked like 'oh, gosh, they're after me'. Then he turned his attention back to Peter, who was currently chugging a six-gallon carton of this supposed 'sake' down. He finished, but he had also just finished one through five gallon cartons before that, so he was reaaallly drunk by now. The girl, whose name they had figured out was Misao, came back with a seven-gallon carton of sake. But before he started chugging that down, he suddenly grabbed Misao around the waist and said, "Hey, baby! You wanna come backs to me place with my?" She slapped the hand away and stated "Sorry, I'm already taken." "Whosit? Where's he? I'll give him the ol' one two!" Peter said, putting his fist up and pretending to punch something, but instead hit himself in the face. "His name is Aoshi. He went to Guatemala. He never actually said why he was going there exactly." She said with a thoughtful look.  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO: GUATEMALA, AOSHI STANDING WITH HIS ARMS CROSSED, SOMBREARO ON HIS HEAD, PONCHO ON HIS BODY, WITH LITTLE MIDGET LIKE MEXICANS RUNNING ALL AROUND HIM, AND TWO LITTLE BOYS WITH PURPLE AND ORANGE HAIR.  
  
"We likie you!" Little midget like Mexicans kept chanting over and over again as they ran around a tall man named Aoshi. "No! You're not SUPPOSED to like me! I'm here to take over your pathetic little excuse for a country!" Aoshi yelled trying to make a point. Nothing worked though. He had been yelling at them, beating at them, and yelling at them some more for the past 10 hours. But they just kept on running around him saying 'we likie you!' over and over again! And then there were those two boys. That one Mexican called them 'Walter' and 'Perry'. They kept saying "Ohmygosh, Walter! Thatman'ssoootall!!" and "Ohmygosh, Iknow! He'slikesupermantimes50!" and they go on in that fashion for the past 10 hours, when everyone noticed he was there. ::"whose Superman, anyway?":: The tall superman-times-50 man thought to himself.  
  
SCENE CHANGE TO: BACK TO THE AOIYA, BEFORE THE LAST SCENE CHANGE.  
  
Meanwhile, Stewie was cringed every time he heard that annoying girl wail. So he walked over to her and pointed the plutonium gun up to her head. "Now this gun is filled with plutonium. So, either you shut the heck up, or I shoot your head to KINGDOM COME!" Stewie said, seeing if that would finally shut her up. "Awww, you're so cute!" The girl said, ceasing her wailing, like Stewie had wished for, but instead of leaving, she picked him up. "NOOO! Fat man! Save me!" Stewie yelled to his last hope of survival. "Oh, gosh. I should have known he'd be chugging a whole ten gallons worth of beer."  
Peter suddenly heard something in the general direction of where Stewie was, and looked. "Hey, James Bond. Isn't that your son over there squirming to get free from that girl holding him and kissing him on his forehead?" Mcguirk asked Peter. Peter, being in his drunken state, said, "No, of coarse not! That's her son! Can't you see the resemblance? Besides, the only son I have is Chris, and he's getting an education in school right now." "Blast! You have failed your fatherly duty, fat man! I WILL AVENGE MY DEATH!"  
  
Uh, oh! The evil Tsubame is taking Stewie, what will happen? Will Peter and Coach Mcguirk ever have the time to get Stewie, if they keep getting drunker and drunker? Find out next time in PETER AND COACH MCGUIRK'S TRIP TO RUROUNI KENSHIN! Toith beith continuedith.  
  
A/N: Was that fun? Was it funny? Well, to those of you who review this, tell us! THANKIES TO ALL THOSE WHO REVIEW!! Until next time, AJOS! 


	2. Chapter Rchinese for 2: of sango platter...

A/N: hello again everyone!! How's ya doin? If you said you were doin good, good to hear! If you said you weren't doin good, hope this story makes you feel better!  
  
PETER AND COACH MCGUIRKS TRIP TO RUROUNI KENSHIN  
  
NEXT  
  
ENJOY!  
  
Disclaimer: me nor we own anything mainly: Inu Yasha, Rurouni Kenshin, home movies, Family Guy, me no own Siye, but Shelley owns her, the song moon light bay, that movie that that flashback part came from, or anything else in this chapter basically. BUT me do own this red pen next to me, and all the other red pens next to me, The Smorsel, the gigglee puppet song, and the word muwahaha-ish. That it though.  
  
"Fat man! You have failed your fatherly duty! I WILL AVENGE MY DEATH!!"  
  
CHAPTER R (CHINESE): OF SANGO PLATTERS, HOT SPRING CRASHINGS, AND CONGRATULATIONS  
  
"Sir, are you ok?" one of the waitresses asked Coach Mcguirk as he lay on the ground. "Brendan, it's called Gingivitis." He said, squinting his eyes. "He's alright, but I don't know about that other guy. He's singing 'Smorsel, Smorsel, The gigglee puppet' and dancing at the same time." After drinking all night and half a day, Coach and Peter finally passed out on the Aoiya floor, and were just finally being noticed and woken up.  
  
"Sir's, would you like a platter of steamed Sango (in Japanese, Sango means coral)? It'll make you feel better." The other waitress asked. "Smorsel, Smorsel, THE GIGLEE PUPPET." "I guess that's a yes." Misao said sarcastically, walking off to get the platter. She came back a few moments after she had left with a girl who had long, black hair, a pink and green kimono on, and a huge boomerang on her back. Her face was reaaallly red, and gray puffs of steam were coming out her ears. "Steamed Sango Platter! Coming up!"  
  
Suddenly, a man with a little pigtail in the back of his hair, a staff, and purple over hangy thingie on appeared in the Aoiya (no, not a bwink like Siye was.). "Ah! Ah! It's gay! Oh my gosh! I'm blinded!" Peter said, finally starting to get his senses back. "NOOOOOO!!" was the first thing, we'll just call him Miroku, said. Then he noticed all the waitresses, namely, Misao, Kaoru (she had to get a job), those other two women in the Oniwanbanshuu, and Megumi, who came for the heck of it all. He put his hand up to his face and firmly stated, "Resist all temptation."  
  
"C'mon, Sango we're going." He said grabbing her hand. If she wasn't steamed up she probably would have smacked him, cause umm. that's her other job. So, they went out, and the last thing that the people in the Aoiya of them was them standing next to a guy with white hair, a red kimono thing, and doggie ears. "You know, I have the strangest urge to go touch those ears on top of that guy's head." Kaoru said thoughtfully. "I would if it were Sir Ken." Megumi said with hearts in her eyes. "Hey! I thought we got it all straighten out that HE was MINE!" Kaoru said, glaring at the fox lady. "I had my fingers crossed." "WHAT?!" "You heard me." "THAT DOESN"T COUNT!" "I felt all Muwahaha-ish. " "HEY!" "Hey what?" "Where'd those two fat guys go?" Kaoru said, as everyone awake looked toward the two front swinging doors, while dust rolled on by, like an old western movie.  
  
***************************IN OTHER NEWS********************************************  
  
"Awwwwwww.." everyone said as Tsubame walked by them with Stewie. "STOP 'AWWWWWWW-ING ME AS IF I WERE CUTE! Wait- that didn't come out right.DANG YOU ALL!" Stewie said, but no one paid any attention, as always. "Is this your kid?" one woman asked. "He looks just like you!" "Yes, he is." Tsubame said, a huge smile plastered on her face. "NOOOO! DON'T LISTEN TO HER! WERE'S THAT DANG WOMAN WHO CALLS HERSELF MOM WHEN YOU NEED HER!?" Stewie said, but like almost always, no one noticed. "Who's the father?" the woman asked. "Myojin Yahiko!" Tsubame exclaimed.  
  
**************************IN OTHER OTHER NEWS************************************  
  
"WE WERE SAILING ALONG.ON MOONLIGHT BAY!" Yahiko and Siye sang as they sat by the Hot Springs. "Wow, it looks so beautiful." Siye said, looking at the sky, even though it was day, she acted as if she had never seen the day before. "Yes, you are." Yahiko replied (yes, I know, from the Lizzie McGuire movie, and I know it's cheesy, but it is kinda sweet, no?), making Siye blush. And then they slowly leaned towards each other, and were just about to kiss when- SPLOOSH!  
All the water from the Hot Springs splashed all over them, burning them really badly. When all the mist cleared, and also after they went "Ow! Ow!" and blew at there skin to cool themselves off, they noticed two figures standing in the middle of the hot spring. They were both really fat, and had black circles that said censored! In the middle of the circle on the lower part of their body, about umm. figure it out yourself. Even though that censor circle was there, Yahiko still covered Siye's eyes. Suddenly a really high pitched laugh could be heard.  
"Neahnahnahnhanhah! Look at their faces! I think we scared them!" Peter said to Jon (he figured that out on the way to the hot springs) Mcguirk. "Uh, yea." Mcguirk said in his usual tone of voice (how do you describe a voice like his?) "This reminds me of this one time, I snuck in on Lois while she was taking a shower."  
  
FLASHBACK  
  
Peter is standing next to a shower curtain with Lois behind it, wearing a ski mask and holding a Butchers knife in his right hand and his left hand is heading toward the shower curtain to pull it back. Scary music is playing in the background.  
  
END FLASHBACK  
  
All's Coach Mcguirk could do is stare at peter like he was a friggen idiot. They didn't even notice Yahiko and Siye sneak away.  
  
***********************IN OTHER OTHER OTHER NEWS*****************************  
  
Siye and Yahiko were walking down the road to the Aoiya, When suddenly everyone 1) somehow had gotten to know him without his consent, and 2) they were congratulating him on something. When they got to the Aoiya, everyone in there congratulated him right when they walked in the door. Then everyone that he knew came up and started hugging and (still) congratulated him. Then Sano said, "Congratulations on the new baby!" Yahiko and Siye's eyes widened. "What? Baby? I don't think Siye's pregnant yet." SMACK!  
  
A/N: Well, how'd ya like it? Yes, I know, it's short, but I'm running out of idea's, and I know I kinda ended in a weird place, but I didn't know where to end!! I wanted to say sumtin else, but I can't remember, umm. please read my other story, DON"T DO STUPID THINGS, you'll like it, it funny, umm. that it I guess, until next time ASTA LAVISTA! 


	3. Chapter Twahfrench: movies made in kyoto...

A/N: hello! Does any one know that Inu Yasha is back on adult swim? I was sooooo happy while I watched it last night, I had to cover my mouth from squealing so I wouldn't wake my parents up. O, and then Trigun!! The best episode of that show is 'Paradise', it sad. I'm not tellin' u why though. I mean those who haven't seen it. Sooooo, You'll just have to watch it when it comes on. Lalala. there was sumtin' else I wanned to say, now I can't remember. O's well's. I think this will be another short, or kinda short, depends on what u think is short, chapter.  
  
DISCLAIMER:::::::::: I do not own Home movies, Family Guy, Rurouni Kenshin, LOTR, a plutonium gun, the Mafia, a cat, my own TV, Flonaise, and anything else I failed to mention. So please don't sue me! ^ ^;;;  
  
Chapter Twah (however u spell it. it French): Movies made in Kyoto, Japan  
  
"Brendan, are you sure we're aloud here? This doesn't even look like our millennium." A nervous sounding eight- year- old (or close to that) girl asked. "Brendan, I have to agree with Melissa." A boy about the same age as the girl said, sounding like his nose was really stuffy. "You guys did bring your permission slip, right?" another kid the same age with a long pointed nose, and a blue camcorder in his right hand said. "Yea." they both said, pulling out their 'permission' slips and showing them to this Brendan fellow. "Well, Jason? Melissa? What are you worried about? We have the permission slips here." Brendan said. "Yea, but, there are no grown ups here." Melissa stated.  
  
"Umm, well, uh." Brendan started, looking around, when he saw a responsible looking man, with red hair (or orangie red, whatever u want to call It.), Purplie (I think.) colored eyes, and a cross shaped scar on the left side of his face (Yay!). "Hem, 'scuse me sir, but would you like to star in a one of a kind Brendan Small movie?" Brendan said, walking up to the man. "Hm? Whats this 'movie' you speak of? I don't know what you are talking about, that I don't." The sir said, smiling. "Brendan, what are you doing?" Melissa whispered. "Getting ourselves a chaperone, cause it seems you guys would die without one." Brendan whispered in reply.  
  
SOMEWHERE ELSE, BASICALLY ANYWHERE ELSE THAN THERE.  
  
"UNHAND ME, YOU... YOU. YOU IMBICILE!" no matter what Stewie said, all's everyone said in reply was, 'aww, isn't that cute!' and, ' you look just like your mom!' He just couldn't believe how idiotic/dense/stupidiotic these people were. I mean, Stewie has a football shaped head, this GIRL who DARES to CALL herself HIS MOTHER has a triangular shaped bottom half of the head, and a square shape 4 the top half of the head. Stewie has black hair, and this GIRL who DARES to CALL herself HIS MOTHER has brown hair. Stewie has little strands of hair every inch or so, this GIRL who DARES to CALL herself HIS MOTHER has a FULL HEAD, a head on which he was going to blow off it's sockets in two sakes of a squirrel's tai, of hair. He has circular eyes, while this GIRL who DARES to CALL herself HIS MOM has triangularish while also being rectangularish eyes.  
  
Then Stewie got an idea, an idea of pure giniusosity, which he definitely didn't get from Peter, or Lois that much. In fact, where did all that geniusness come from? Like I said definitely not Peter, and probably not Lois. Oops, going off the matter at hand. Sorry. Anyhoo, Stewie had a brilliant idea. "Waaaaaah!" He whined, pulling out a lamp out of nowhere and hitting Tsubame up top the head with it. "I want my mooommmmmy!" He whined more, this time pulling out a vacuum out of nowhere and up chucking her on her chin. "Wha-what are you talking about? I'm your mother." Tsubame said nervously as everyone started to murmur. "How dare you call yourself MY MOTHER!!" Stewie said, pulling out his plutonium gun.  
  
"Wh-what I-is that that swe-sweetie?" Tsubame stuttered fearfully. "What the devil are you doing calling ME sweetie? I am not your son, so, therefore, YOU ARE NOT MY MOTHER!!" Stewie pointed out, putting the gun to her head. "Honey, pu-put the gun dow-dow-dow-" Tsubame said, not being able to spit the last word out. "Oh, for heavens sake. Just say the blasted word." Stewie said pulling the trigger. "OOOOEEEEEGAAAA!" was the last thing they heard Tsubame's head say. "Well, now that that's over, I'll be on my way to find the fat man who calls himself Father." Stewie said plaintively as he got up and started walking away. Only then did he notice all the stares of the people around him. "What are you doing here? There is nothing to see here! Now go home and do what ever you filthy people do for a living!" At that everyone left and the streets within a 3 mile radios was cleared. Except for the Tsubame body which suddenly got up to hunt Stewie down to get revenge, but then got hit by a car, or a carriage. "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry, miss. You, you just jumped out in front of this carriage on this, the day of my other daughters wedding out of nowhere! Oh's well. Her families loss." a fat man in a tux, and with a white kitty in his lap, said in a Mafia leader-ish voice.  
  
SOMEWHERE ELSWHERE THAN WHERE TSUBAME JUST DIED  
  
"Hey, are you sure we were heading in the right direction?" Peter asked Coach Mcguirk for the millionth time that hour. "Yes, I already told you!" He replied. "You sure? Cause that doesn't look familiar." Peter said, pointing to a small statue of a really scrawny looking guy, with huge eyes, and only a few strands of hair. The statue description read: SMEAGOL. That's all it said. "Then what is that restaurant over there? I told you I could find our way back to that Aoiya place." Coach Mcguirk said, pointing to a building that looked similar to the Aoiya. So, not even thinking that it might be some other restaurant, or even a house for that matter, they headed towards the place they thought was the Aoiya.  
  
And when they got there, they were really surprised to see a family just sitting down to eat lunch. They stared at Peter and Coach, and vise- versa. Although, maybe looking into space like a complete idiot with no expression at all isn't really staring. When the family got sense that there were intruders in their house, they screamed, and then, out of pure stupidity, Peter yelled too, while Mcguirk still stared into space like a complete idiot. When everyone stopped screaming, Peter had one thing to say; "Do you guys have any beer?"  
  
AND NOW BACK TO BRENDANS GROUP  
  
"Umm, ok! Stand right there, and hold your neat-o sword out in front of you, Mr. Kenshin, and Jason, do what he is doing, and.Perfect!" Brendan said, holding his camera up. "I better get going to Kaoru-dono, before she blows a fuse." Kenshin said, looking kind of fearful at the thought of Kaoru loosing it because he didn't show up on time for her birthday. "This Kaoru-dunna can wait!! My memory span can't!" "But-" "Don't 'but' me, Mister!" Brendan ended the conversation. "Brendan, what should I do with this water you made me get?" Melissa asked, holding a ten-gallon water jug thing of water. "Go set it-" His sentence was cut short because of a loud screaming noise coming from someone's house. And so, Kenshin went towards the screaming, cause he had to try and save the family, and Jason followed, because he was told to do what Kenshin does, Brendan followed, cause he thought it might be a good action scene, and Melissa followed because everyone was following everyone in front of them, so she thought she best not destroy the chain.  
  
When they got there, the yelling had stopped, and they faintly heard someone say, "Do you guys have any beer?" And then Kenshin opened the door thing, Jason pretended to open the door, but instead fell over in exhaustion, and hit the floor, Brendan panted up to the door, still taping the whole thing, and Melissa caught up, just fine (she dropped the bottle, cause it was heavy). When they finally noticed everything, they noticed two large men, one wearing a white shirt, glasses, green pants, and was staring right at them. And the other man was wearing an orange and yellow jump suit thing, had a whistle around his neck and was also staring at them.  
  
"Coach Mcguirk?!"  
  
"Brendan?!"  
  
LATER ON  
  
"So, Brendan, how'd you get here?" Coach Mcguirk asked. Kenshin went a while ago, saying that Kaoru was going to kill him, and that he will come back to be in their 'movie', unless they made it to the Aoiya. Right now, everyone (except Stewie) was headed to the Aoiya, so that Peter and Coach Mcguirk could have a 'couple' of drinks. "We snuck in the trunk of your car." Brendan answered. "WHAT? YOU DIDN'T DRINK ANY OF MY BEER, DID YOU MELISSA?" Coach said, enraged. "No, Coach Mcguirk, you're scaring-" "BRENDAN?" "Aha.. uh no." "JASON?" "Maybe just a little bit." "Jason, I don't think that purple stuff was beer." Melissa said, a little concerned. "Well, then, miss know-it-all, what was it?" Jason asked. "I don't know. Coach Mcguirk, what was that purple stuff in the back of your car?" Melissa asked. "Trust me. You don't want to know." Coach Mcguirk said. "Neahnahnahnahnahnahnahnah!" Peter laughed. "Actually, we would Coach Mcguirk." Brendan said, staring out of the corner of his eye at Peter. " Ok, then come here." Jon Mcguirk said as everyone, including a complete stranger, leaned in. "It's pshpshpshpshphsphsphsphsphsh." He whispered. Suddenly, Jason turned green, and turned around to puke. "Gross! Coach Mcguirk, why would you do something as gross as that?" Melissa asked turning a little green. "It keeps the zebra's away." He stated. "Um, there are no Zebra's in America." Brendan said. "So?"  
  
"Neahnahnahnahnahnahnahanhanahanah!"  
  
A/N: Well? How'd you like it? O, yea, if any one knows what 'Oro' or 'Omake' means, PLEASE TELL ME!! And if any one has an idea for this story, please tell me, cause I'm running out of idea's. o, and if I'm using anything else from a different story, I am really sorry, because of I am, then I don't know about it, honestly! So just tell me. WELL, that's all I can remember, untillie next chapter, AJOS! PEACE OUT! GUATEMALA! 


	4. CHP 4: ehmu choose, im flat outta ideas

A/N: DAH! I had to erase what I had already written for this, because it was going absolutely nowhere and my mind capacity couldn't fix it up!!! So I started again. And its still going to suck. So, on with the chapter that will get published 6 months from now I JUST KNOW IT. Dah. Dah dah dah dah dah dah. Flah. First, to go over some things: *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*= transition *.* =background, trust me, you need to know this for one part + "."= talking, silly!! DISCLAIMER: I'm sad. And no one but me will know y. but I'll tell ya. I'm sad because. . . I don't own anything in this story.  
  
Chapter 4: Of birthday parties and uninvited guests (hey! I'm already liking this better!!)  
  
It was a quiet morning in Kyoto. The sun was shining, and not a creature was stirring, except Peter and Coach Mcguirk. Very loudly, I might add. Why, you might ask? Well, lets take a journey to the night before with the ghost of Christmas past. Or me. So come and know me better, readers (sorry! Its around Christmas time Su.. Yea..)  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*TADA! It's the night before! *~*~*~*~*~*  
  
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MISS KAORU!!" everyone at the Aoiya exclaimed. And even if they didn't have big celebrations like today, well, it's a fan- fiction, so it doesn't really matter. "Thank you everyone!! Um, just out of curiosity, are those fat idiots anywhere near here?" Kaoru asked, hoping with all her might (+ it was her wish on the first star she saw last night) that THEY weren't anywhere near. "No miss Kaoru. I left them in the place I walked from, that I did." Kenshin stated. Everyone let out a sigh of relief, and grabbed a piece of cake (That Kenshin had made, mind you) to enjoy the peaceful night they had left. Little did they know. I mean, little did they know that Peter and Coach Mcguirk were just a few miles away from the Aoiya. *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* "Ah, geez, are we there yet?!" Peter asked tiredly. They had been walking for almost. Let's see. "Uh, Mr. Peter sir, We've only been walking 5 minutes." Melissa said matter- of-factly. "Oh, look whose underwear is all up in a bunch! All's I asked was 'are we there yet', and she gets on my case! Geez, kids these days." Peter retorted. "Um, my underwear isn't all bunched up." "That doesn't make since, Peter." Jason said. "What did you call me?!" Peter angrily said. ".Peter." "How rude! Kids should know to call me Peter- califragilisticepsialidochious! Pf, kids these days." "But-""EH! No talkin back Mr. 'I didn't know it was for the zebras'!" And they left it at that. *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* "Data entry: I am trapped in some.vile place, where they keep feeding me 'miso' soup. I have been cautious as to not eat it, for all I know it could be poison. But judging from the way they look, it might even be.acid! Oh, their good.I have to try that on Lois someday.If I ever get out of here! *Awww! Look at him! Your soo adorable, yesh you are!* AAH! GET AWAY FROM ME, YOU HOSTILE CREATURES! I AM AFRAID TO REPORT.THAT I MIGHT NOT MAKE IT THROUGH THIS! GOODBYE, RUPERT! The only thing. I am disappointed of...Is.not killing Lois!" Stewie concluded, turning the tape recorder off.  
  
Stewie first stumbled upon this place while trying to find his way back. As you can probably tell, some girls who thought he 'was just the cutest thang' found him roaming around, and, of course, thinking they were doing the 'poor' baby a favor, took him to some restaurant and bought him loads of miso soup. They are pinching his cheeks till they fall off, he swears. If he could only get his hands on that fat so-called 'father', he'd have him pay for putting him through all this! First, it was that.creature who called herself 'Tsubame', now all these.'GASP! They must be followers of the one before them! BLAST! They've come to get revenge on me! I should've never killed her! Oh well, I still have some ju-BLAST!' Stewie thought, looking down to his plutonium gun, and realizing it was empty. "BLAST YOU! BLAST YOU ALL TO *heck*(a/n: in this case, the *.* just means its beeping out a word. Unless Stewie is talking when *.* appears, it will ALWAYS mean its bleeping out a bad word, k? k.) I WILL GET REEEVVVEEENNNGGGEEE!!!" *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
"Wow, Miss Kaoru, you've got quite the birthday throwers livin' with you!" Siye exclaimed (A/n: BTW, when Siye first came in, I said she had WHITE chocolate colored hair. Oops! I meant to say milk chocolate! Sry for all the confusion! I guess I was thinkin of chocolate, and white chocolate is like my fav-). As I had said, it was Kaoru's ( I dunno! U pick a number) birthday today! Everyone was having a blast, enjoying themselves, getting them selves drunk.Actually, that was Sano, because he was playing a game he made up himself, called 'find the sake'. It was actually quite fun! I play that sometimes. Only with pop."AHEM! Can we get back to moi?!" Oh, sorry. like I said, it was Kaoru's birthday! The cake was all gone by now (hey, I would eat it fast too, since Kenshin made it! "HEY!"), and Sano was getting even more drunk than probably the legal limit. If they had one back then. Yahiko was.*ahem* walking around with Siye, the MILK (aren't you proud of me??) chocolate haired girl Yahiko had met in the first chapter. Kaoru was basking in all the attention she was getting, ESPECIALLY from Kenshin. And, as if it were that hard to figure out, Megumi was swooning all over Kenshin. So, they were all enjoying themselves. Except Misao. Don't get me wrong, she was having a blast. Except.except she wished that HER Aoshi were here instead of Guatemala. Whats so great about Guatemala, anyway? Its just a .er.state? Anyway. Unless.GASP! He's seeing another girl there! 'HAHA, don't make me laugh! He wouldn't! .YES, HE WOULD!' "AOSHI, GET YOUR BUTT BACK HERE RIGHT NOW!!" she suddenly burst out.  
~*~  
  
"OUCH! SAANNNOOO, THAT'S NOT THE DONKEY, THAT'S MY BUTT!!" exclaimed a very hurt Kaoru, rubbing her bottom. "Thorry.*hic* couldn't tell from here." he said quite.drunk..edly."That's because," Kaoru sharply explained," you've played too much of that stupid game you made! . SANOO! YOUR TOO DRUNK TO DO ANYTHING!" Kaoru rubbed her bottom again, for Sano had poked it yet again. "Megumi-chan, could you please take Sano upstairs to rest? He's quite drunk, that he is." Kenshin asked POLITLY like every time else he had asked. "I'd do anything for you, Sir Ken!" Megumi, delighted that he, the great and handsome Sir Ken, had asked her, the great pale doctor of Tokyo, to take Sano, the tall drunken idiot, up to rest him to bed, there at the Aoiya.  
  
So, off she went.  
  
Not long after, though, there was a strange sound coming from outside of the Aoiya! OH MY GOSH! COULD IT BE? THE TWO DRUNKEN IDIOTS WERE BACK?!  
  
Nope. Just a short guy with black hair (EEEEE! MY FAVORITE PAAARRRTTT!!!). "Whew!" everyone gasped for breath. "Hn. Has any seen Yukina?" (A/N: I betcha some of you thought it was Vegeta! HA! He's not cute LIKE HIEI! HE'S MINE! STAY BACK!! *uses sword that Smorsel wishes she has to fight off all the fan girls*) "Who is this 'Yukina' you speak of? Listen, this is MY birthday party and NO SHORT MAN IS GOING TO RUIN IT!" Kaoru stated matter- of-factly. There was a short silence, as the 'short man', as Kaoru stated, was starting to look quite.whats the word.much-more-than-ticked off. "Woa woa woa, shorty! Calm down! She doesn't know that you're short!" a tall, oranged hair guy said, walking in the door. Following him was a blacked hair dude (7.7heheheh SHELLS) and a red hair person walked in. "GRR, OF COURSE I KNOW HE IS SHORT! WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE, I'M BLIND? DO YOU NOT SEE TWO PURTY BLUE EYES?!" Kaoru.said. ".No, I see red really big eyes." Kuwabara, oblivious to how mad Kaoru can obviously get, said. "RRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!" Kaoru yelled pouncing on Kuwabara. "Miss Kaoru! Please stop!" Kenshin pleaded, trying to figure out who was Kaoru, so he could pull her away so his.I mean, their Kaoru wouldn't get to badly hurt. "OK Kenshin!" she stopped, and as the dust cleared, they could tell that she had given Kuwabara a substantial (OOO beat that!) amount of beating. And then.could it be? Was that.really horrible singing? The room fell silent once again, as they all awaited to figure out who this horrible singing was coming from. Of course they were all expecting the worse. You know, this means that you should probably hide in fear right about now. *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
"Data entry: I have finally escaped the wrath of the 'Tsubame' followers with little damage done. I am now on the hunt for the fat man who calls himself 'father'. That has proven little luck. But I feel I am on the right path, for there is a faint stench in the air which smells like him after he has consumed a huge amount of beer, or as they seem to say, 'sake'. And for a few minutes, I've been hearing a faint.dying-frog-that-can-still-croak sound, which I am suspecting, no, which I KNOW is the two fat men that call themselves guardians. What a joke! HAHAHAHAHAHA!" Stewie was indeed close to Peter and Coach Mcguirk. If you didn't know any better, you could saw he was right behind him. Hm.that kinda makes you thinks. *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
"72 BOTTLES OF BEER ON THE WALL, 72 BOTTLES OF BEER! TAKE ONE DOWN." you would think that they would have known that their voices would have been dead by now, but alas, no. Brendan, Melissa, and Jason all had to suffer through their singing. Yes, their ears hurt. Yes, they wish they had brought a bat along with them. Yes. But, alas, no. they didn't bring a bat along with them. "63 BOTTLES OF BEER ON THE WALL, 63 BOTTLES OF BE-" "WAIT!" Peter screamed. "I think we skipped a few numbers, and also," he continued, "I think we're there." He finished, pointed to a building that look familiar. "I think we are to." Coach said. "So, where's our warm welcoming? You'd think that people like them would miss people like us!" Peter said. Brendan, Jason, and Melissa laughed, because that was all they could do after Peters comment.  
  
A/N: so yea! Hope yall liked it! . NO ONE READ IT! I KNEW IT! EVERYBODY HATES US, SHLEY!!  
  
Shley: 7.7 hoo-rah.  
  
Smorsel: how could you say that?  
  
Shley: @ least no one will bother us.  
  
Smorsel: you're so mean! So anyway, to any one that actually read this:  
  
PLEASE REVIEW!!! ;_; c? imma sad!!! 


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